from The Year 2008

I lifted these from the notations I made just after our own New Year's Day Celebration.



It is already 2:12 in the morning on the very first day of the New Year.

We have just finished eating our noche Buena and my mother and siblings are all asleep. The house is supposed to be quiet and there is a noticeable lull in the fireworks.

However, I’m here, right in front of my desk, taptapping on the keyboard. I couldn’t help pondering the past especially after an enlightening luncheon reunion with the previous co-staffers of our publication back in college.

Was the year 2008 okay for me?

So far, it has been kinder than the other years. I was able to land a teaching post at my old Alma Mater and I am being paid a monthly regular salary by the Local School Board.

You could say that I was able to grow up. In a manner of speaking.

I am more confident than I was in the past. I became capable of dealing with people and I have stopped deluding myself that everything is all about me.

I have come to accept my physical appearance and the limitations it brings. But, I also became aware that I can do something about it, which I am going to do this year.

I am still the same person who is quite resolved to succeed in her career and be able to enjoy life and the lessons it brings. But, I am no longer as averse to the idea of marriage and family as I was before.

I mean, I found out that having a family would be cool. Having a husband to share the burdens and joys of life and having a kid to pass on all those precious things I have learned would be nice. In the right time and place…and with the right man.

I made a lot of mistakes this year, mistakes that I have to pay for. Not only that, those mistakes already encompass all the other aspects of my person.

I also need to clean up my act regarding teaching. I must admit, I am one of those people with a chip on their shoulders. I carry a bagful of load made up of psychological and emotional problems that somehow clouds my capacity to judge fairly.

In the last few months, I have become an exacting person. One who serves according to how much one is paid.

I kept forgetting that I am a high school teacher, not a City Hall clerk or messenger.

I kept forgetting that the littlest action and reaction from me are drops of water in a vast ocean of materialism and cupidity.
I realized the evils of my ways when I got in touch with my previous buddies in college and our previous Publication adviser who is a tower of strength and a fountain of wisdom to us.

I realized that I am a teacher and I took oath in a public ceremony declaring my willingness to pass on the knowledge hoard by the intellectuals of the past who longed to preserve civilization.

As one of my fellow staffers put it: Whatever the environment is, whatever other people say or do, just make sure that your students will learn something from you.

I am a teacher, first and foremost. I did not choose this profession because of the money it will bring to me and my family. I originally chose teaching because I know it will give meaning, and a sense of direction to my life.

I am a teacher and my mission is to teach. That is the best lesson that I have learned this year.