But, while lying in bed 30 minutes after the clock struck 12, and a little dizzy from drinking three glasses of red wine (can you get drunk on that stuff?), I kept remembering one New Years Eve celebration that went awry...well one or two.
The first one happened when I was in grade school. I remember lying awake all morning of that New Year, listening to the silence of the house...a stillness I did not appreciate at that time. I remember promising that I will never spend a New Year in that kind of solitary silence- with tears as consolation. That was the one time I can specifically remember that our family did not welcome the New Year with its usual celebration. Something happened but I was too young to understand.
Then, I remember another New Year celebration I spent listening to My Chemical Romance The Black Parade while swilling Carlo Rossi. That wine was not chilled and all the bubbles went to my head really, really fast. It was more a funeral party than a New Year's Celebration and my sibling and I spent it listening and replaying The Black Parade.
Then, my fascination for New Year Celebrations ended. Waiting for calls from loved ones when you can have them around you and rushing around from one house to the next makes occasions such as this one rather meaningless...fruitless.
How do I feel right now? I want to drink another glass of that wine. I think I should get something stronger (but I really hate the taste and smell of hard liquor). So now, here I am, listening to The Black Parade again while making promises that sometime in the near future, I will not be subjecting myself into charades like this one.
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